sf on keeping up with the Jonesses

I forgive myself for allowing myself to feel inferior when others boast about anything to make them feel bigger.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to cry and wish that the world was a better place to live in because of how people just boasted and wanted to make you feel small.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to succomb to people's attempt to making me feel that I am less than them.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to wish that certain people never existed on this planet.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to avoid certain people and escape from them to avoid having to deal with their stupid behaviors at wanting to make you feel inferior.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to hate certain relatives because of their attitudes towards wanting to be higher.

I realize that escaping from them means escaping from myself by not wanting to face my embarassment at not possessing that what they have. Instead, I breathe and do now allow myself to feel that I am any less than anyone who drives luxurious cars or enjoys a luxurious life.
I realize that feeling a victim was just a form of me being treated as a slave where instead of just listening and not reacting, I just allowed myself to feel bad and inferior. I realize that self suppression has lead to nowhere, and only allowed me to become a miserable victim as opposed to being self honest and being happy for the person who obtained that what they want.
I realize that those that tend to show off are also those that themselves face insecurities inside and they need to tell the world they are better off than anyone else.
I realize that I have everything to make me live with dignity and that I need not seek anything that is out of me. Everything I need, I have and is inside of me, not out there. I do not need a huge wedding or a fancy car. I just need a car that I feel I can drive for practical purposes and not for the intention of showing to the world that I am better off that anyone else.
I realize that keeping up with the Jonessses means to compete with someone and I do not allow myself to compete  for the sake of having a winner and a loser. I believe everyone is one an equal and therefore I shall no longer succomb to wanting to compete with someone else.